What do you believe in?

If you’re human, you have something you strongly believe in. Something that moves you. Something that moves your soul. Something that gets you to stand up and want to take charge.

If someone were to ask you, what is your belief, how would you answer?

This morning on my Thursday Coaching Conference call, my coach decided to single me out and challenge me with this question, “Nevaeh, what do you believe in?”. To be honest, I froze thinking, “Is this a spiritual answer?” My angle is always to respond with intellect, but being in the line of work I am in, I have to first respond with my heart.

I said, “I believe in human equality.”

My coach went on, “In what regard?”

I responded, “In all regards. How can I not want that for humanity? Our world in America is defined by laws, restrictions, and conditions that leave hope to be equated to hopelessness. I want to put a stop to it. It is unfair to watch people for example, who have had drug issues due to their upbringing, location, what they are exposed to, to be constantly judged for what they do not know how to overcome. Remember Bryant? Remember how I fought for him? This was recent! How terrible is it to feel judged? How terrible is it to feel conditioned because a judge or a law official tells you that you cannot become anything more than a drug addict because “this is what you live in, this is what you were born into”. This is the SOCIETY we live in today. This is the TRUTH of our SOCIETY. This is the government we support everyday. It angers me, it brings me pain to think of it. I am glad that I was able to help 1 kid, 1 teen to move into a school system and work on his GED with supervision and assistance to EDUCATE about drugs, about the reasons why it is “wrong” and more importantly, how to correct his behavior by showing him how life CAN be for him. By giving him the choice to choose for himself.” 

My coach responded, “You provided hope.”

I responded, “No, I provided him a choice for his life. That’s all I wanted to do.”

My coach responded, “This is your life’s purpose.”

For the last almost 10 years of my sobriety, I have meditated on questioning my existence. I should have been dead. I have my book on drug addition called “Doctor Me” coming out in Spring of 2013 and it’s been a delight and hardship to work on it. Tough only because I am reliving moments of my past that I wish I could just put to rest, but I am excited to share the ways that I helped “Doctor” myself and how I used counseling, family, friends, and an openness to overcome my demons to help myself, now in turn to help others. I didn’t realize that I was onto something until I met Bryant about 6 months ago. I’m not one to sit on an idea. I’m not one to sit and wait for someone to make the first move. When I met Bryant, he was clearly lost. All he had to say to me was, “I want help. What do I do now?” I took the wheel for him, and showed him how to steer for himself.

I was challenged. Opposed. I never had a mother get in my face the way his did to me. I argued. I battled. I’ll eventually share his full story one day, but it posed a huge question in my mind this morning on this call…what do we believe in? How are we making changes and progressing in those beliefs?

I’m a Type A personality, and I get that most of the coaches I work with are too, but as we all look around this world as social entrepreneurs we see issues. We see holes. “Stop believing in authority, and start believing in each other” is something that we should ALL as a society be focusing on. Asking ourselves, why are we still giving authority power and control? Look at your world! Look at your society. Are you proud? Do you believe in it? You live in this society, it is yours. Take ownership. Are you hurting it or saving it? Do you feel like YOU are too small to make any kind of change? I know I did…for a while…but one kid…one child changed my world. His NEED for change, touched me. His NEED for guidance motivated me. What will move you?

I instantly felt like a complete idiot the moment I took on Bryant. I felt like an idiot because for years I just sat still. For years I didn’t move, didn’t seek. For years I only TALKED about helping. For years I only DREAMED about a refuge center for kids. When will YOU take a stand for something YOU believe in?

My conversation with the coaches lasted an extra 45 minutes longer than expected. A well spent 45 minutes longer. ” Ms. Morgan, how can I assist you in the change movement?” “Ms. Morgan, I can help donate a shelter offering in a 3rd world country.” “Ms. Morgan, I can help donate my time, free of charge for 3 students.”

Speak up. Talk, share YOUR passions. People will be moved when they see your passion. They will believe in your passion too. It becomes infectous when it comes from an honest heart.

What will you do today that will make a difference for tomorrow?

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Just say Yes! “It is a genuine responsibility to FIND things with EAGER INTENT to REVIVE YOU.”

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So this morning….prior to my life coach meeting check in, I had a random contemplative moment driving by the beach. I was contemplating my happiness.

Hear me out…

When you have gone for years “unawakened” you spend that time in a dark state, a state of depression…a state of vision-less adornment, and a state of unawakened potential. The term often used is a “dirty mirror” which is a view of what you have for yourself. Most of us, are unawakened for years….some never truly awaken.

It’s been about 4 years for me since I began an overwhelming transformational change in my life….and it would have never came to fruition had it not been MY choice.

This morning, driving by the beach I was hit by this nerve reaction to my now long standing consistency of happiness. I know it sounds crazy to contemplate over that, but living in happiness for 4 years compared to over 10 years of unhappiness and confusion…you can see where at times it can be very difficult to accept happiness as a way of life vs something that is earned. There has not been much drama in my life, because I run from it like a bat out of hell, and I’ve only shed tears out of extreme happiness or being wonderfully moved by a beautiful moment. This is new…

I couldn’t help but crack a smile in the midst of me recognizing my joy…and recognizing how fully awake at life I am.

I recently got back out in the water. I was introduced to surfing last year and never really cared much for it. It was something my friends wanted me to do, I was always a climber. However, this last Saturday I was hit with the bug. You know the, “Yes” bug. I could feel the entire week a weight slowly weighing me down and I couldn’t get my finger on it. I could feel my blood boiling and in desperate need to “let loose”.

On Saturday, I heard my name calling out for me in Oceanside as I was getting coffee, and the words, “Come let’s surf I got an extra board!” Oddly enough, my natural instinct is to assess my situation and THEN answer…this time…thank goodness for being bitten by the yes bug, because without hesitation I said yes! The best part, I didn’t even know who called out my name when I said yes…

I looked up and there was my old colleague Paul who I haven’t seen in over 6 years but always kept in touch through email and texts. He reminded me of an old wise man who just chilled on the beaches in Hawaii and just lived for waves. His daughters both are heavily involved in surfing and rock climbing so lucky me I was already set with the equipment I needed. I also thought since my flipping boyfriend is a surf instructor I better get my shit together… (only because I’m highly competitive 😉 ).

That day around noon…I got back in the water. I was FRIGHTENED!!! I kept saying, “I’m totally going to eat shit. Just warning you.” He would laugh and push my board out next to me. His laugh kept me in a positive spirit, and calm. He was very patient with me, reminding me of some instructions I remembered from last year. The only difference was I was on a shorter board….and much to my surprise…this was EASIER for me.

He told me, “Lil Nev, this board is going to be difficult, but knowing your personality, I think this is the right kind of challenge for you. You can choose whatever you want, but at least you are learning for yourself. There is no wrong way today, this is experimental.”

I loved that approach…isn’t that a similar approach we take on in life? Isn’t that how we should be taking on experiences in life?

I turned the board around with him as I was ready to catch a tiny in most surfers eyes waves, but for my 5’2 98lb stature it was ginormous! I could hear him yelling out to me, “Lay on the middle of your board! Paddle Paddle Paddle!” “Pop up Pop up!”

First try….First run…stood up.

I remember standing up and though it was only for about 5 seconds, it felt like the best eternal experience.

I felt alive again.

All the weight on my shoulder…gone…

All the stress beginning to bog me down…gone…

All the unhappiness wanting to bubble up….gone…

I felt free again.

My point is this….

Often times we don’t take heed to the feelings of contemplating or depression, or even sadness when we are awakened because, we don’t think it’s possible we could go back to that state.

That’s a foolish thing to think first of all….even life coaches, counselors, psychologists, a nun, a pastor…we all have to face the demons inside of us, and it’s unfortunately apart of life for evil and negativity to want to corrupt a happy and rested soul.

It is a genuine responsibility to FIND things with EAGER INTENT to REVIVE YOU.

Every day this week I was finding myself being called to the water. If you know me, you know how many excuses I have made in the past to NOT surf…now I can’t stop. The feeling of being awakened time and time again every time I just sit out there, I feel revived.

This week has been the most rested, energetic and back to the “me” feeling I have ever had.

I have recognized all the unhappiness wanting to burst through me, because I took the time to combat against it. I know the root, and I know a strategy now.

Being aware…IS being awake.

What are you doing to challenge your unhappiness, your stress, your whatever it is that is bogging you down…what are you doing to revive yourself?

Please for the love of God, try something other than yoga. Get outside of your comfort zone…and just say yes.

Here’s a challenge…just say yes. One day…and see where life takes you…

Your opinion of the World…IS a confession of character…

“People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

This morning on my conference call with my fellow motivational speakers, I was in awe of the quote that was rambled off this morning. I LOVE Emerson, so it wasn’t a big surprise that my ears and heart perked up over the conversation. However, I was surprised to hear the punch line…”is also a confession of character”.

For a while, if some of you have known me for years or have watched my growth path, you’ll understand where and also why I have come to a certain thought process on society. No No I don’t “hate” society, but I do think that in some aspects, our society has grown lazy in thought, and lazy in strength. That is why there are motivational speakers, life coaches, relationship experts that are employed by either their own practice or books. However, the coach who teaches us was right in adding to Emerson’s quote…we DO have a duty, each and every one of us, to AFFECT change, to then alter our thought process of what the world is; no matter how frusterating or ugly it can be.

I place a whole lot of responsibility on myself for self growth. I view self growth in 3 ways,

1. Physically – Am I taking care of MY body, MY temple. I try and participate in my love for rock climbing and ballet as I have for the last 8 years of my life, and incorporating beautiful scenery with my physical activity, since that is important to me. I try to hike, camp, partake in beach activities as much as I can.

2. Emotionally- Am I emotionally balanced, and if not what will I do to balance myself? I meditate or paint usually to stop the static in my mind. I appreciate beautiful art accompanied by music, and doing this alone will also help bring about any emotions that are festering deep inside of you.

If you ever find yourself crying out of nowhere, or feeling emotionally overwhelmed try sitting alone (hell even in your car) by the beach during sunset, or a nice quite park, and feel the love for yourself. When you cry alone or feel emotionally overwhelmed, it is a sign that you are self neglecting and you need to revisit why, and make the appropriate changes so you put yourself first again. Remember: You cannot make others happy without making YOU happy first.

3. Taking on something new- One of the best and quick ways to learn about yourself. Self discovery is not only fun but brings about questions and new ideas of growth for yourself. I sometimes even just take a different route to work, have lunch with someone new at a new place, or one of my favorites is vintage shopping alone…I get to search through new territory and discover new pieces. It thrills me!

However, since this conversation this morning each one of us decided to add to each of our own checklists.

How can we change our opinion on the world to an effective positive way to affect change in our character if this is a direct correlation?

Challenging I know…we all debated for about 45 minutes before someone blurted out the most obvious answer. This to me reminds me of a piece of advice I gave to a client:

“When all else fails, when you doubt and have no direction….just love.”

I love the World. I love the World. I love the World.

I appreciate what the World provides me, I want to sustain what the World offers in its natural beauty.

It was as if a mantra was occurring through my ears, and my eyes began to transform in thought of HOW I was viewing the very World I live in

I have been begging the Universe for a challenge…this morning I was granted my wish….

What will YOU do to affect change on your opinion of the World so your character shines ever so brightly in positivity?