Dare your passions and see what happens…

As a follow-up from my previous post on goals and how I’ve been progressing in my re-creation of my business, I decided to share some insight of things I have learned that help propel me into an introductory state of where my goals are.

Having worked with so many business owners, and now having been a business mentor for so long, I have found one common denominator in creating success. Each individual has had a mentor. I have my own mentor myself. Some either use mentorship through books or online reads, while others have a life coach or a business mentor to assist them in-goal setting and vision strategy. As some of you may know, creating a business is not all that it’s cracked up to be. It is hard work, and it is a very personal project regardless if you work with a partner.

For years I couldn’t connect with a guru for myself, someone who understood how my mind worked and why it worked the way that it did. Little did I know the various relationships I have had since 2006 have all attributed to my “mentorship”. As I’ve talked about Mr. Moses in a previous post, he is definitely a person who I would say was a mentor to me. He was a business owner, and his wisdom carried through his lectures with me. Often times I would go there to read to him, some books I brought were on religion, spirituality, travel, love, and then business. He always insisted on me reading business and a book by Scott Peck called, “The Road Less Traveled”. He and Scott became a mentorship program for me as I began to delve into being a business owner.

Long story short…over the years I have opened and closed businesses. I have been successful and sometimes those successes were long successes, while others I came crashing down on my face. I have built with blood, sweat and tears my own ideas of an empire, and I have watched myself allow fear to control my passions, and watched that “empire” come crashing down. THIS is the reason why I find it so necessary to openly share, not only because I was asked to, but because I want to see others gain success by NOT allowing fear to engulf YOUR ideas.

The project I have posted above is one that I received from a friend of mine who learned from her own motivational guru. See why I love sharing knowledge? Anyway, this project is one of the first things I come to whenever I DO something. I ask myself, “Why Do I get out of bed?” and sometimes I sincerely answer, other times the roaring confident woman in me answers, “Because I’m meant to do more!” That voice of confidence is what you want to listen to all the time. I know what it is like to second guess that confidence, we gain confidence based off of the experiences we have, experiences of us falling on our face, BUT….even if you have no experience in the particular field or project you are going into, HAVE that confidence, BELIEVE in that boldly, it will propel YOUR passion.

Secondly, I create rules based on that project that I alone will live by. These are personal, and will shift and change with each project or endeavor you take on.

Thirdly, I ask what my gut instinct is. For me, my gut tells me everyday that I am to passionately seek people who want to build upon their visions and dreams, and to assist them in doing so.

Lastly, I ask myself what I enjoy doing. This is IMPORTANT and fundamental for you and your growth and not to mention your sanity. Taking a moment out of your mind, your business, your project, to just live…breathe…experience your surroundings…is imperative to your success. Remember that. That’s why I love being outdoors, I use all of my senses to experience MY moment. It revives you.

Many of us don’t grasp that life is fleeting. Are you wanting to work 9-5 for the rest of your life or are you wanting to create a life that allows more freedom for yourself? How will you keep yourself motivated? How will you instruct yourself to be daring?

For me…it was through the relationships I gained. I gained confidence based on what they saw in me because I was seeking with an open vulnerability to be better than where I was yesterday, an hour ago, a minute ago. That’s just me…what are you doing to actively participate in your growth?

I visited the senior home yesterday to pick up a book that Mr. Moses left for me. A note was included in the book, a snippet from it read, “I love you, our talks we had. You are meant to change this world, and you will go down in history. Remember, your heart comes first. You have a huge heart, it is not meant to be covered.”

Mr. Moses saw something in me, he spoke my language and has forever changed my life. His last meeting with me has officially turned an “on” switch in my heart. Our hearts, are NOT meant to be covered. On the 4th of July, it was almost 5 months since I saw him. I visited him at random, and his first words were that he needed to speak to me. It was one of the best meetings we had thus far, little did I know it was our last. After we met, the nurse told me he specifically asked for this book to be purchased and to write the note.

Sometimes, (bear with me as I wipe my tears)…we don’t know how close we get to people who inspire youthat you inspire them too.

It is incredibly important to put yourself out there, to share your passions BOLDLY, so that your positive powerful team will grow. You want to gain confidence? Start by doing that…you will have an entire team backing you…believing in you…rooting for you…and pushing you to achieve YOUR passions.

You want change, create change.

You want to inspire a movement inside of you, dare yourself to be uncomfortable.

You want to conquer fear, then face it without second guessing yourself.

You want to stop second guessing yourself, then act.

Ask yourself How Will I Instruct myself to be more daring?

and then SHARE WHY with anyone willing to listen.

Within just 30 days, you’ll see your support unit will multiply. Count me in as your first.

With Love,

Nevaeh

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Ladies, YOU are an UNSTOPPABLE force…

“You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.”

So, some exciting news is that the long time passionate fun that my family and I would do every time I visit back home in the South is Vintage Shop. I started when I was a little girl with my Great Grandma and Grandma in St. Joseph Missouri. They would take me first to the beauty shop where I got to play with different ways to do my nails and got immediately obsessed with all the scarves and hats that were sold in the beauty shops. I always loved the charm that little towns in the mid-west and South had and maintained the quaint love of vintage in each memory I have as a kid.

It’s no surprise that years later I was buying in bulk every single time I visited the Carolina’s. One weekend my step Mom and I were out every single day, 4 days in a row and after spending a couple hundred dollars, I walked away with almost 2 suitcases worth of AMAZING jackets, shoes, scarves, hats and the list goes on. I later used them in modeling, gave them away to friends, and eventually started selling them.

” I would have never thought of wearing some of the hats I wear or scarves I wear before you.  Now I am bold and brave about it – all thanks to you!  You give me courage.” These comments are the very reason I decided to turn a family tradition into a business. The West coast unfortunately doesn’t even come close to what the South offers, and for a while I was talked out of this idea of bringing the Southern vintage to the West Coast. Now…after many conversations, interactions with local businesses…I have found just by extending my tentacles that this idea could help save the love of vintage in the West Coast. Had I not begun a small research, I would have spent another several years doubting MY idea. How terrible!

My point is this…I am an opportunist. If I see an opportunity, and I feel as if I can somehow provide an opening, an assistance, and it’s geared from my passion…THEN ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY am I going to pursue it.

So many times now I hear of women talking themselves out of great ideas because business still sometimes is viewed as a “man’s world”…

Real talk…Ladies…my lovely ladies…embrace the change, embrace the inspiration that’s inside of you. We only have ONE LIFE…and though I am thankful for having had the career path I had, I am all the more grateful for the career paths I create for MYSELF. Once you have done it once…you are forever changed.

I have 2 mentors that tell me constantly, “Nevaeh, YOU ARE AN UNSTOPPABLE FORCE” and every day I battle with my annoying doubter side of me who tells me otherwise. If I listened to that other voice…I would have never gained the experience that I have today.

So I’m telling YOU now ladies, YOU ARE AN UNSTOPPABLE FORCE…YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CREATE ANYTHING YOU WANT FOR YOUR LIFE BECAUSE YOU ARE STRONG, CONFIDENT, SMART AND DON’T FORGET AMAZING. UNSTOPPABLE FORCES ARE A THREAT TO THOSE WHO SPEND THEIR LIVES DOUBTING. YOU ARE NOT A DOUBTER…YOU ARE UNSTOPPABLE.

Sometimes…it’s best to just fall…and KNOW…you can always pick yourself up.

Fear is the #1 conqueror in our everyday lives.

What I have ALWAYS loved about the women who I have met within the “pin-up/vintage world” is they all have the very same attitude that I have in my heart…it is a no bullsh!t approach to life, a “I don’t give a crap I’m doing this…” attitude and the very confident courageous yet open embrace to life that is the reason I BELIEVE in and look up to the women who have this.

Each one of us women…have the capability to inspire and feed the fire of our motivation, we have an uncanny way of using our intuition as a power to cultivate our determination.

I have met more business owners that are women than men in today’s business world, and I am in constant contact with local businesses being in the field of work I am in, and the best advice I can provide to any woman out there who is second guessing is this…YOU ARE A CREATOR OF YOUR LIFE…ask yourself these:

1. Am I HAPPY with what I have created?

2. Is this MY creation?

3. If it’s not…what is the picture of MY CREATION?

4. Am I holding myself back because of “circumstances”? (and if you are, snap out of it…you’ll be stuck there for years never moving forward, constantly talking yourself out of it,and then someone else will come up with the same idea and pursue it)

and 5. What’s REALLY stopping me? (Face it…and move FORWARD…if you felt excited over a project or an idea with that burning desire to do it…then DO IT!)

Find a role model that you adore…mine are Audrey Hepburn and Oprah, both timeless women who evoke courage and beauty from within, I learned and still learn many lessons of the type of woman I want to become thanks to their attributes.

Who is your LEADING LADY and what are you doing to cultivate a new direction for YOUR life?

“The future depends on what we do in the present. – Mahatma Gandhi”

The dictionary identifies “inspiration” as the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something.

Incredibly interesting because that poses the question, how many of us are moved by what our mind tells us or by what our heart tells us?

Passion is the driving force for motivation.  I remember one instance with a business owner in Los Angeles a few years ago and we had a life changing discussion about passion. He told me that he didn’t have passion. He didn’t know what “that” was. In one swept motion I touched his shoulder and said “that’s heartbreaking.” I will never forget the face he gave me, and the instant tears that ran down his face. I struck a chord! I thought, shit what do I do now?

I gave him his moment encouraged him to “let it out” and that he did. I told him to do one of my favorite exercises that help with getting all the “static thought” out onto paper. I handed him a freshly sharpened pencil and a sticky note. I said, “Now I want you to write only one word descriptions of how you feel and how you felt 5 minutes ago. You can only write on this one post it.” He looked at me like I was crazy, but I did my nod of encouragement and walked over to his window of the 18th floor. This window took up from floor to ceiling, it was stunning. There was a moment where my stomach did a flip being so high up.  I could hear his pencil tapping on the conference room table as I looked over at these vast skyscrapers. “Breathtaking isn’t it?” he said.

My response, “Is that how YOU feel about these skyscrapers, about this view?” He gave me a smirk of a smile, then nodded at me and started his one word project with his old school no. 2 pencil. I stood still with my back to him, looking out the large glass window and just smiled from ear to ear. “He understood” I thought in my head. Standing almost 16 floors up, I could imagine why he would question his “skyscraper passion”. Is this really beauty?

I wanted him to grasp the moment, revel in HIS moment. He reached a pivotal point in HIS LIFE. Often times we miss this by being overly concerned with the approval of our mind, identifying the moment as inspired thought. For example, how many times have you probably overlooked a sense of inspiration because you thought, “well I didn’t THINK it happened” or “my mind didn’t say that I did”.

The mind is what keeps you rational, that I believe, but often times it can be the demise of major life transformation.

After this session we had, I got a call from him about 2 weeks later. This business owner sold his company, and checked out of his skyscraper to move cross-country within a few months. “I’ve always wanted to travel.” He told me…and you’d assume a successful business owner would have done so, but as he went on to tell me, “I realized I gave my 20 years to business, I want to give the next 20 to myself, doing what I love.”  It always fascinates me and excites me to witness a vision and the domino affect of change that happens because of that, regardless of what direction it takes them. It’s inspiring to see the motivation, as a “can’t stop me” locomotive. This guy I knew had it. He had that spark that I try to find in every person I work with.

He is currently involved in rescue for horses and breeds horses. He is a huge advocate and passionate soul for animals. He is using the funds he was making and providing charitable support and making some MAJOR changes in the realm of saving horses from being euthanized.  The idea of what a “perfect life” varies from person to person. I shared parts of his story to help give you the vision that often times is misrepresented that being successful or “living the dream” isn’t always about how much money you are making. Want to be rich? Go about doing something that YOU are passionate about…it won’t feel like work, and you’ll find yourself happier, healthier, and more vibrant for the rest of your life.

Have you taken a good look at where you’re at in your life? Are you happy or are you just stuck on the hamster wheel? Are you really living? Or, are you like my previous client, finding his real truth in the midst of defining his own passion…in skyscrapers?

“The future depends on what we do in the present. – Mahatma Gandhi”

Outdoor Project to get you on track!

Which is it that best describes you?

1.  It’s a TASK to sit down and write out the goals that you want to accomplish or is it 2. More of a TASK to actually do the work that is involved to make those goals become successes for you?

62% of my clients find it more difficult finding a dream that they can focus on. Most of my clients are visionary leaders themselves…anyone that runs their own company or has the balls to do that, generally has MANY visions of goals on their plate. The difficulty at that point really then is narrowing it down, which is where I come in.

I’ll teach you one tiny little exercise that I do with my clients and it involves going outdoors.

For me, I am a huge believer that being with nature and really “one with the Earth” as I call it, you can reach such great clarity. The first time I brought one of my Investor/CEO’s out for this project he asked me, “Nevaeh, no offense but why the hell are we going in the middle of nowhere?”

My response…”In the middle of nowhere that is where your loudest thoughts get quiet, and your quiet thoughts roar.”

I remember looking back at him on the trail, and he just smiled and nodded at me.

Now, the majority of my clients range from San Diego county to LA county…and there are PLENTY of secluded areas for you to do this project.

HEAR MY VISION ROAR PROJECT

Suit up in clothes you are not worried about getting dirty. I know how some of you business owners get

Comfy Shoes – at most I would recommend about a 2-3 hour total hike

Pack a lunch and plenty of water

Bring your vision journal & a handy PENCIL (no pens allowed)

Camera (optional)

Choose your hiking location: If you have problems with this, just ask me.

***Please don’t be a dip-wad and go alone.***

THE HIKE

The purpose of the hike is to QUIET your mind. Most of us have our minds on constant chatter throughout the day. ALLOW yourself the time to breathe, step away from the office and business plans mentally and emotionally CHECK IN to YOURSELF.

Each step you take say to yourself your daily affirmations (REFERENCE: Project Love Thyself).

Do not talk to me or the partner you are with – this is about YOU.

I at one point will stop you and ask you to begin to journal….

JOURNAL

1.    Top 3 things YOU enjoy

2.    Explain WHY your chose them

Please try to make them non-business related.

PROCESS

1.    30 minutes reflection

a.    Reflect on WHY you chose the 3 things you enjoy

b.    During this time feel free to write anything in addition to your “why’s” any notes, any feelings, jot them down.

2.    15 minutes REVISION

a.    You may choose ONE to revise, and explain WHY you revised it

3.    Meditate on the entire process

a.    Timing based on YOU and your comfortably

PURPOSE

The purpose of this exercise is designed to quiet the chatter that goes on in your mind throughout the week, your month and sometimes over the last several years. You may experience being emotional, crying is definitely okay, sometimes you may experience being angry out of time lost, and that is okay too.

You will find that this process will AWAKEN you. I want that for you. I want you to feel REVIVED and ANEW.

At this point we will work on your ACTION PLANS and execution of what YOU decide.

Be excited….celebrate YOU and YOUR vision!

Avoid “The missed opportunity”….

Image

Innately, each one of us has dreams. Sometimes they are called goals and goals are just masked as dreams, while sometimes you don’t even know you have a dream until the very opportunity is placed before you to head down that particular direction. But why aren’t more of us pursuing our dreams? Are we waiting for that “sign” of approval to go and chase after our dreams? Are we being too careful and eventually psyching our self out?

I had lunch with an old colleague about a few months ago and discussed the idea of pursuing dreams. During our “catch up” lunch date, she told me that she quit her 5 year position recently and has been enjoying living off her savings. I was SHOCKED! This girl was more into business than I was! I immediately questioned her sanity, as she laughed and filled me in on her recent inspiring action. “I felt SO alive when I realized that this isn’t how I pictured to live my life. I would rather figure out how to pay for things doing other jobs that interest me, vs staying another year of desk job work at a company or position which wasn’t something I felt passionate for. I am not unhappy, I liked my job, I loved the company, but I only live once…and though the money was great, I wasn’t living.” She began to rattle onto me the math of how many hours you work in a two week basis, how much dollar amount to work ratio that it actually was, basically she dissected her decision to the point of making sure she was completely rational in thought. I admired that.I admired her passion and drive for pursuing a new life. A life that was a life she created and wanted for herself. She now does French tutoring for a small group of people, she cuts hair on the side and all the other free time she has is spent devoted to green initiatives at a solar company working a very low minimal 10 hours a week and makes inspiring strides towards companies to change and become green. She gets more money and more time to do the things SHE wants to do. She went on to tell me that she was snowboarding more at Big Bear, and that she plans to vacation in Hawaii in the summer. I was in awe at how many various jobs she had going, but so much life was gleaming from her. I was so jealous and in a way I was judging her decision thinking she would regret doing what she did.

That conversation continued to resonate in my mind and occasionally come back in my head at random over the last few months.

I thought very seriously about my life, where it is at and where I’d like it to go. I knew the conversation I had with her made an impact I just didn’t know in what regard. I have taken pride in my ability to just up and leave a position to pursue another position that was more in line with the type of work I wanted to do, or gain a skill I needed to gain in order to move ahead in my goals. But…there was my problem…I was looking at my goals as the masked dreams as they are.

At what point of our lives did we learn that “following our dreams” was a bad thing?

Real talk…how many times have you pursued a dream? I see so many mutual friends of mine that have worked their tails off at a dream and now finally seeing them come true. I have worked personally with several tycoons who are experts of dreaming and watch them vigorously chase after their dreams…but yet we have the tendency to limit ourselves based on fear. Our belief tells us that this dream is for someone else…or someone else is already doing this…and then before you know it…you are faced with a missed opportunity.

How dirty is the reflection in the mirror we look at?

I thank God, the Universe and whatever else I can thank that has brought me into the paths of some extraordinary people to help inspire inside of me a need and deep rooted desire to follow MY dreams.

Following your dreams is work…

“Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm!” and so it is true. Emerson takes up a lot of room in my quote collection as his words resonate truth to me. I used to think that following your dreams was so easy, you think it and BOOM it happens…

Wrong.

Here’s the truth…yes there are people in this world who are very fortunate to know the right people and have the funds easily available….basically they have opportunity after opportunity thrown in their lap. The real science to it, is being open to opportunity.

It took me a very long while to grasp the “rich getting richer” concept, really was based on perspective. How YOU view your current situation is correct. On the contrary, how you view how you want your situation to become, is also correct.

Whatever we think about…we bring about. Whatever the mind can conceive….you will achieve.

Age old sayings that once you are in THAT zone of inspiration…that is when all those moments add up, the quotes, the affirmations, the motivational discussions, the random discussions all of which bring you to that crossroads moment where you FEEL and decide if you plan to pursue that feeling of change, or to deny it and potentially have a missed opportunity.

Life is too short. Plain and simple.

I am dealing with a medical condition right now called Cluster Headaches…they are terrible! They deem the nickname the suicide headache…go figure I get the one headache issue that is incurable haha! I cannot help but sometimes look at my situation and laugh…this could be worse is what I always tell myself. It helps me put things in perspective, and to remind myself that I am confident in my ability to create and alter my life based on certain events or needs that have to be met for myself.

Once you choose that your happiness supersedes all…that is when you know you have power to create and change anything in your life….

It provides unrelenting power.

Think of being in a relationship….why be with someone who isn’t taking your happiness into consideration…you naturally would think of yourself and want more for yourself…ultimately leaving your relationship to pursue something or someone more in line with your happiness.

The same is for everything else in your life.

Sometimes, we live life as work and love…having a very thick line between the two, providing rules and regulations for the two separately. This is a very dangerous and minimalistic thought process…and for years was my issue of being unable to unlock my potential.

Find the confidence in you to FOLLOW your dreams.

Whatever they are…follow them.

Here’s a quick way to find confidence in you to follow your dreams…

The Timeline

I am a planner so what I did was create a timeline. I do them for anything I am involved in…again goes in with my need to not waste time.

I lay out my dream (i.e. The Change Movement) I’ll use as an example…

I write out Jan – Dec on the timeline….and write out a to do list off to the side and number them out 1-100.

Each month I’ll write down the number assigned to the particular task under the day I completed it.

This allows me to VISUALLY see what I am doing, and what is left on my to do list. It gets encouraging to see things marked off, or to see one day numbers 1-9 all completed. This will also let you know if you are rationally following a dream. I have done that before and found things just didn’t add up and moved onto a new project.

The cool thing is, once you realize you can follow any dream you have…you’ll find your plates need to be full.

Here’s to dreaming…and here’s to watching those dreams come true for you.

With love,

Nevaeh

De-Stressing…is it time for a career change?

So this week was not really a week I anticipated. In a rumbling rolling of a week, I hit some major bumps which resulted me in the Emergency Room on the 5th. Not my finest hour, as I reflected puking my guts out as my dad held my puke bucket I thought, “What the hell, why am I SO stressed out?”

Hurling nothing but liquids, I realized my body was reacting to everything I was holding inside. That’s when I started to cry…

“You cannot neglect yourself”, I was told. “You have to de-stress.” and those words alone got my blood pumping! Talk about a picture of stress. I’ve been involved in business since I was a tyke. I watched my father build and tear down businesses, and was fascinated by the power and management he possessed with ease. Little did I know, my dad also was suffering from elevated blood pressure and extreme stress. Guess I learned how to hide it from him, since later in my years I was going through the same exact thing.

At age 21 I was making 6 figures, was in the most tumultuous relationship known to man yet I stayed in it for another 5 years (talk about effing madness) & was surrounded by friends who weren’t adding value to my life. I made a drastic change entering into my 27th year except for one iota….I haven’t wavered from business.

I have all kinds of amazing new uplifting and abundant friendships, I have cultivated loving bonds with my family again after being on the road for so long, and I made decisions to make myself happy & not to mention, met one pretty kick ass guy along the way.

However, having been hospitalized, I started questioning lying there on that terribly uncomfortable bed…”What am I MEANT to do here on this Earth & why haven’t I tapped into that yet?” so I decided…I am going through my conquering 20 list in hopes that it will help shed some light to this intriguing question.

So….being the analytical person I am, and the need to constantly cultivate happiness in my life…I first start with my health. I used to do yoga and pilates, and somehow work nabbed my attention. This happens to often. I think that’s called an addiction. I came across this photo to one of my favorite posts about yoga, and thought, “Shit…I want to be relaxed like this chick.” If anyone wants to join me on my yoga-ness I’ll be going somewhere in Carlsbad. The more the better….

In addition, I’ll start tackling my list of top 20…and fine tuning that answer to that question. Though I am good at business…and though I will miss the constant ups and downs that comes with that territory, I do realize it is imperative for me to take a step back and “smell the roses”. I am addicted to work. It is tough to admit that, especially when you are good at it, how do you walk away? Ask anyone who has seen me at my peak, you can’t pry me away.

One thing that helped was a conversation my father told me yesterday, “You’ll always be good at work, but once you lose your health, you have nothing. Focus on your health, and take this opportunity to do something that makes you happy, give back the love and support you love giving so much, and FIND YOUR true calling. Business and Marketing was my idea…it’s time to find yours sweetheart. It’s okay.”

For that…I love you dad….thanks for releasing me.

To my friends & family, I’ll need all the help I can get to keep me calm, rested, collected, and like this chick in this picture…healthy and BALANCED.

Time to cut my addiction and get addicted to health.

Much love,

Nevaeh